Children are affected by domestic violence, even if they are not present during an incident. They may hear the violence from their rooms, or see the aftermath such as bruises, broken possessions and moved furniture. Children also pick up on emotional abuse. They become confused and unsettled and the parents cycle through the abuse cycle, sending incompatible and inconsistent messages of love to the child. The child becomes increasingly distressed as their parents oscillate between loving and kind, to stressed and highly anxious, to demanding and unstable and so on.
These children often feel unsafe, isolated, anxious, depressed, angry and distrustful of authority figures. As a result, they may display behaviour or emotional problems such as low self-esteem, hyper-vigilance, antisocial behaviours, eating disorders, sleep disorders, unhealthy boundaries, suicidal ideation and/or rigid views on gender roles to name a few.
These problems may follow them well into adulthood and manifest themselves through alcohol/drug addictions, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), adult depression and/or perpetrating or being a victim of violence in relationships themselves.